Tom Emmer's poem of the day: "The Homophobes Are So Nice!"

Andy Birkey at The Minnesota Independent has been doing fabulous yeoman's work on the connections between the Republican Party of Minnesota and homophobic Christian Punk "ministry" band, You Can Run But You Cannot Hide.

Check out Birkey's work in GOP-linked punk rock ministry says executing gays is ‘moral’.

That was followed up by Emmer campaign donated to controversial Christian punk-rock ministry.

And Birkey bird-dogged the story with Emmer on anti-gay hard rock ministry: ‘These are nice people’

The Republican-endorsed candidate for governor, Tom Emmer, told the Star Tribune’s Rachel Stassen-Berger that You Can Run But You Cannot Hide Intl., Inc., “are nice people.” You Can Run is a ministry that brings it’s hard rock evangelism into public schools across the Midwest and its front man, Bradlee Dean, told radio listeners recently that Muslim countries that call for the execution of gays and lesbians are “more moral than even the American Christians.”

Emmer’s campaign has given money to the ministry, and Emmer has appeared on Dean’s radio show, been to Dean’s house and posed for a picture with leaders of the ministry following his endorsement by the Republican Party.

“My understanding is that it’s a Christian-based ministry that’s about family, that is about respect for yourself….I know that they’re a pro-marriage, pro-traditional marriage group,” Emmer told the Strib.

Bradlee Dean, front man for the group, lives in Annandale, which is in my state senate district, so the story quite literally is playing out in my neck of the woods.

Perish the literal-mindedness, though. Time for a poem! Here's a riff on a charming classic by that naughty D. H. Lawrence:

The Homophobes Are So Nice!
By Tom Emmer  

The homophobes are so nice
so awfully nice
they are the nicest people in the world.

And what’s more, they’re very nice about being nice
about your being nice as well!
If you’re not nice they soon make you feel it.

Gays and Lesbians and Bisexuals and so on
they’re all very well
but they’re not really nice, you know.
They’re not nice in our sense of the word, are they now?

That’s why one doesn’t have to take their humanity seriously.
We might be nice to them, of course,
maybe, unnaturally—
But it doesn’t really matter what you say about them,
they don’t really matter—*
you can just say anything about them:
be nice, you know, just be nice
but you must never take them seriously, they wouldn’t understand.
Just be nice, you know! oh, fairly nice,
not really nice of course, they take advantage—
but nice enough, just nice enough
to let them feel they’re not quite as nice as they might be.

*Update: At Polinaut, Emmer says this is a "non-issue." Okay then. The comments are instructive. While Emmer and his defenders are trying to run, they can't hide from his legislative record on social issues.

Photo: That nice Bradlee Dean (left) and his nice friend Tom Emmer (right). Image used with permission of the Minnesota Independent.

Comments

[MNObserver]

There are some comments at the MPR Polinaut post that question whether Emmer is a social conservative. Mitch Berg gets into one of his shrill and insulting fits at the very idea that Emmer is about social policy, while some guy named Wesley is apparently from a universe where there are no newspapers and demands a "bibliography" of references about my statements on Emmer's record. I have tried twice to post the factual references to Emmer's record, but for some reason (maybe too many links?) it's not going up. For what it's worth, here's the post:

Tried to post this over the weekend, but something went wrong. Emmer's record on "social issues" (i.e., the civil rights of women and gays) is best appreciated by his own record in the legislature. For the benefit of Wesley - and Mitch, whose facts are all too often demonstrated only by linking to his own posts - here we go:

Castration of certain sex offenders:
http://www.house.leg.state.mn.us/members/pressrelease.asp?party=2&pressid=201&memid=12260

Cutting funding for MN Aids Project because he didn't like an organization dealing with a sexually transmitted disease talking about sex:
http://www.house.leg.state.mn.us/members/pressrelease.asp?party=2&pressid=468&memid=12260

Bragging about 100% MCCL rating for his support of whatever unconstitutional limitations on women's health care MCCL proposes:
http://www.emmerforgovernor.com/issues/socialvalues/

His full throated support of pharmacists who get to choose which properly prescribed medication you can actually get:
http://www.house.leg.state.mn.us/members/pressrelease.asp?party=2&pressid=1235&memid=12260

The role call on the vote on the Final Wishes legislation this session, SF 0341:
http://www.house.leg.state.mn.us/votes/votes.asp?ls_year=86&session_number=0&year=2009&id=2864

Roll call on the anti-bullying legislation last session, SF 0971:
http://www.house.leg.state.mn.us/votes/votes.asp?ls_year=86&session_number=0&year=2009&id=2230

Emmer is an extreme social conservative, has been since he arrived in the legislature, and has been more than willing to use elected office to push his social agenda. His attempts to recast himself as only about taxes and spending are ridiculous, and there is nothing that would suggest that he won't use the Governor's office as a platform to continue to push his social agenda.

I don't know if he "hates" gay people or not. The record, however, shows that not only does he vote against their interests whenever he has an opportunity, but that he seeks out chances to work against their interests.